1. “Reject – More holes than my grandad’s string vest!”

拒发。漏洞比我爷爷的网眼背心上的窟窿还多！

2. "Done! Difficult task, I don’t wish to think about constipation and faecal flora during my holidays! But, once a referee, always and anywhere a referee; we are good boy scouts in the research wilderness. Even under the sun and near a wonderful beach."

搞定了！太不容易了。我才不想装着一脑子便秘和粪便菌落来度假。但是，一朝做了审稿人，永远都是审稿人，到哪儿都是审稿人。在科学研究的荒漠中，我们是勇敢的童子军。即使在洒满阳光的沙滩上也是。哼！

3. "This paper is desperate. Please reject it completely and then block the author’s email ID so they can’t use the online system in future."

这篇论文烂到家了。请彻底拒稿，然后封了作者的账号，免得他日后继续投稿。

4. "The writing and data presentation are so bad that I had to leave work and go home early and then spend time to wonder what life is about."

写作水平和数据展示让我整个人都不好了，我不得不提前下班，早点回家，花点时间思考到底什么是人生。

5. "The biggest problem with this manuscript, which has nearly sucked the will to live out of me, is the terrible writing style."

这篇稿件的写作风格太糟糕了，审得我都不想活了。

6. "The presentation is of a standard that I would reject from an undergraduate student."

就算回到本科生时期，我都会拒掉这种水平的投稿。

7. "This paper is awfully written. There is no adequate objective and no reasonable conclusion. The literature is quoted at random and not in the context of argument. I have doubts about the methods and whether the effort of data gathering is sufficient to arrive at a useful conclusion."

这篇论文写得太烂了。目的不明确，结论不合理。引文都是乱引的，跟正文的论证完全对不上号。我怀疑这样的实验方法，也怀疑他们收集的数据不足以得出有效结论。

8. "Season’s Greetings! I apologise for my slow response but a roast goose prevented me from answering emails for a few days."

节日快乐！回复慢了，真抱歉。有一只烤鹅妨碍我，让我几天都没顾得上回邮件。